If you're not Him, you come a distant second

It's been a long time, but I think I'm going to get back to blogging. In the past few months, I've been out of town 5 weeks, flown and driven long distances a few times, gotten body-searched by airport security, bought an iPhone, performed in a choral concert or two, and had my five-year plan altered at least twice, once by an external change and once by an internal one. God has answered several very significant prayers, and I think I had my mind blown yet again yesterday.

Pastor Gary continued his series through Colossians, and came this week to the topic of the 'hope of the gospel' addressed in 1:23 and reference elsewhere in the chapter. He challenged us in the morning to write our own description of what our own hope and the biblical basis for it. As I've recently noticed, it's often very difficult to separate my own convictions from the way I was raised. It's one of the few disadvantages of second generation Christianity, because it's possible to just coast through without having to differentiate.

If I had to put it in brief, my hope is based on the simple combination of what IIRC is a couplet of verses. The former says "No one can come to Me unless the Father draws him" while the latter continues "Come to Me, and I will give you rest." Both are equally true, though at first blush contradictory. How can he freely invite those who can't come unless he is drawn? How can one come while knowing he is unable to come without help? The real thing that proves one's election is not that you come, it's that you keep coming. Election doesn't mean you get pushed into Christ's arms against your will... it means that you have your heart changed so that there's nothing in the world that could keep you from those arms. How do I know I'm elect? Because there's nothing that's more valuable to me than Him. No friendship, no relationship, no job promotion, no hobby, no thing. If you put any of them up next to him, you'd think I don't value it at all. Period. And by His grace, that's how it's going to stay.

Strangeness

How does someone you haven't talked to in at least a year or two have you pegged? How does he give you the particular piece of advice / friendly shove in the right direction that you need at that particular moment? It's a strange thing to say the least. Thanks, Paul. Now all I have to do is follow your advice; that'd be the more faith-requiring part.

Joe Dutcher preached an amazing sermon on the parable of the lost son from Matthew 15; pity my brothers weren't there to hear it. He invited them and I bent over the nails, but if you can't make a horse drink, you certainly can't make a hardened sinner come to the gospel, even when it's being preached by someone they seem to respect. God doesn't answer prayers the way I want, but He knows best.

Living by faith

It's Thanksgiving and I'm full of turkey, and that's all I'm going to say about that. Well, not really; we had a lot of people in and it was a blast. Strangely, I'm not quite the same full-of-one-liners and the life of things around the folks as I am in other situations. I guess it's just the "visitor" syndrome, since all of them see each other semi-reguarly and I'm 700 miles away.

Living by sight would be so easy. No second-guessing, wondering, hoping, worrying, criticizing, or regretting -- because the plan of God would be a known quantity. The place that every little action held in God's outworking of good in my life would be known; I wouldn't have to wonder if I'm doing the right thing, if I'm missing something, or if I'm just getting in His way. It wouldn't require any faith, prayer, or trust... because it'd all be so obvious.

The life of faith strikes our pride right at the point between a desire for control and an feeling that I'm missing out on something. A clear understanding of God's providence combined with His absolute goodness is the only cure, but it's a poison pill to the I-know-best mindset.

If you can't tell, I'm confused at the moment. Yes, I get confused. No, that's all you get to find out. No, it's not that. Thank God I'm not controlling the universe, as nice as that would seem to be. If I actually need it, He'll put it in my path. Being confused is a good place to be, because nothing makes me lean on Him more.

with all your heart

I'm back in NY again, celebrating yet another birthday, hanging out with an old friend in NYC for a day, and then crashing for a week with my folks. I got to setup the rat's-nest-of-wires that is my parents' stereo system... lots of fun. I missed getting a free ticket, $200 and a paid-for hotel stay on my flight up, but I guess I can live without it.

It's amazing how just hearing a line from a song can bring a million things to mind... especially when it's "love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, with all your strength."

Birthdays are one of those occasions that make you reflect over the past year, and past years. God, give me an eye that sees through the disappointments and frustrations of the present to see the gracious preventative purpose. Give me an eye that sees beyond present good times and blessings to see His preparation for future responsibility.